You are not a promising candidate to see 'Ace Ventura: Pet Detective. You know that a lot of critics praised Steve Martin in 'The Jerk,' but you liked him better after he started acting more normal. Youve looked at some Lewis comedies, but you dont get the joke. For instance, if you were to look up the NFL's 'All Time Bonehead Plays,' you might read about a Miami Dolphin kicker named Ray Finkle, who missed the 26 yard field goal in the closing seconds of Super Bowl XVII.Īce Ventura: What you wouldn't read about was how Ray Finkle lost his mind was committed to a mental hospital only to escape and join the police force under the assumed identity of a missing hiker manipulating his way to the top in a diabolical scheme to get even with Dan Marino for whom he blamed the entire thing!Īguado: What the hell are you talking about?Īce Ventura: SHE'S NOT LOIS EINHORN!, She's Ray Finkle, she's a man. You know that the French consider Jerry Lewis the greatest screen comedian of all time. Lois Einhorn: He kidnapped Snowflake! He killed Roger Podator and was going to kill Dan Marino and meeeeee!Īce Ventura: Ho ho ho Hooooooooooooo! Fiction can be fun, but I find the reference section a little more enlightening. Melissa: Put your guns down or this cop gets it. Roger Podacter: Alright, it's almost time for Coach Shula's press confrence, uh, lets let Heinz do his work?Īce Ventura: Go to de conference, go to it. Akay Akay Akay?' und he is saying 'AKay Akay!' und he is up on ze tail 'Eeeeeeeeee!' und you can quote him! Reporter: Where is Snowflake?Īce Ventura: Why do you care about Snowflake? Do you know him? Does he call you at home?Īce Ventura: Do you have a dorsal fin? To train ze dolphin you must zink like ze dolphin! You must be getting inside ze dolphin's head. Reporter: What happened to the *regular* trainer?Īce Ventura: Vat happened to him? Vat happened to me? Seven years I am wit Siegfried.Īce Ventura: Ve are making de dolphins disappear, und den Roy is coming wit de vite tiger und ze shtuffing in de pants und den I'm gone.

You want to talk to de dolphin, you talk to me. Ace Ventura: How can I be getting zis vork done wit all de shouting? Control de shouting?Īce Ventura: Heinz Getwellvet.

Ace ventura pet detective quotes